strong coffee mornings.
Saturday, March 22nd, 2008
Another beautiful day in Los Angeles. I think I might take back what I said about rainy weather. Although I adore it more than sunny skies, I am really enjoying how nice it has been lately. What a gift it is to stray away from peacoats & fuzzy scarfs & boots. What a gift it is to be scantily clad in cut off shorts, spaghetti strapped, cotton tunics & droopy, long, thin-fabric vests. This is what I am wearing today, by the way.
As I was trying to find something clever to wear this afternoon, I was struck with the realization that I have way too many clothes in my closet. I mean… WAY too many clothes in my closet. My husband would probably say something like “duh!” to that, but truth be told, I never thought of this at all. Had I done that, I probably wouldn’t have overspent at Target the other day. Instantly, I became distracted at this realization & began to attempt cleaning out my closet for the 5th time this month. I was going through the articles of clothing like a very thick but elaborately interesting book. What I found were clothes that I had completely forgotten I had! Dressed & shirts & even a few pairs of jeans that I have neglected to give attention to. Needless to say, it was very embarrassing & I only ended up finding one measly little shirt to add to my pile of donations to the thrift store. One shirt. I can’t bear to see anything else go, although, I really need relieve my closet of so much clutter. So, from this day forward, I vow not to buy one article of clothing until (I’ll make it easy on myself, seeing as I’ve said this time & time again) oh… I don’t know; June? That seems reasonable. I hope to stick to this vow this time for the sake of my packed closet. I almost feel a bit sorry for the hangers that keep them; they’re jammed into each other in an unforgiving way. My closet is really a distaster but not in a messy way, just in the sense that there are so many clothes that it’s really quite overwhelming. I don’t know why it wasn’t obvious to me before about all of these clothes I have… I guess I never really counted my blessings.
I also told Lover that I am temporarily banned from going to Target. Period. & if I must go — they’ve got amazing deals on food items there, so I typically do my grocery shopping in that wretchedly hypnotizing place — he needs to come with me. I am not strong enough. He called me just now, actually, saying that he is done with his workout & is going to walk to Target if I’d like to join him. Proudly I declined. I’d much rather write, anyway. It saves me a lot of money.
It’s been a peaceful morning. I actually was startled awake this morning because it had dawned on me that I had slept through the whole night entirely. I haven’t gotten a decent night’s rest for about a week or so, due to the stresses of finding work (which I have put on hold for a little while to focus on my writing), obnoxious & senseless disagreements me & my husband have had & family worries (my mother has been consistently sick with something for a few weeks now; my sister is missing home, which is causing me to miss her even more & my dad’s distress seems to be that he has yet to change). All of these things aren’t in my face so much during the day so it all hits me at once when I am trying to get sleep; how convenient. Fortunately, it was very quiet last night; in my mind, I mean. Lover & I woke up at a shocking 10:00am this morning. I haven’t slept in that late in a long time. I could have slept more, actually… but my guilt got me out of bed. I had strange dreams, though, due to my eyes being completely shut all night. It felt like I had one long & uninterrupted dream last night that made no sense & kept switching stories every few minutes. All I remember is a doctor who was examining me (he was an OBGYN I think) a music festival that involved me getting high (shocking since that is far from my character) going joy riding with my sister through the streets of my old town, & a few weird fantasies about ex-lovers, which is very strange considering I haven’t given them not even 2 thoughts lately. Funny how the brain works.
I am going to go out & enjoy the sunshine.